#54 "Tales Of The Unshod #6: Imprinting"
The first thing that I experienced coming through the birth canal was a pair of forceps that were used to yank me from the sweet, unworried world of Hotel Mommy.
I do believe I imprinted on this stainless steel tool. It explains my very odd predilection for wanting to yank people from comfortable places. If I walk in a room and
I see that you're all comfy on the couch watching TV...yank! I drag you to the kitchen and make you sit on the linoleum floor and drink
I have days when I feel cold and spoon-shaped. I hear "waaaaaaaaah" in my head. The only thing that makes these things go away is
to find someone sleeping, pick them up, and throw them into an ice bath. It's not my fault. I have no control over it. I am the
victim of an aggressive doctor who couldn't wait for me to get through the birth canal in my own time. I was comfy, and had no plans
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Crusted Salt comics by Jimmy Brunelle